It’s Like Stealing, But With Stamps!

October 6th, 2003 Posted in 2003

I just heard a radio commercial for some sort of free pizza promotional give-away with two-fours of beer. I forget which beer—I think Molson—but the deal is, it’s not like the coupon is in one in four two-fours, or one in eight or something. The coupon seems to be in every two-four. It’s a “personal pizza”, so I assume it’s a Pizza Hut tie-in, and you just get one of those little guys.

But here’s the thing: at the end of the ad, the announcer comes on and gives the usual legal obligations. At the tail end of the spiel, in this really fast voice, he says “no purchase necessary.” This has to be a mistake, or else I’ve misunderstood the promotion. “No purchase necessary” provisions are there to satisfy certain legal conditions, such as people not wishing to buy the product still being able to play, with an equal chance of winning as someone who purchases the product. But as I understand it, everyone wins the coupons: they’re in every two-four.

I’ve got to figure out which one is wrong: if the commercial was just misleading, then you simply get a chance to win pizza through a ballot or something with every two-four. But if there’s a coupon in every two-four, then the commercial actually screwed up with the legal provisions. Because technically, with no purchase, every one of us could write a hundred letters to Molson and get back 100 coupons for free pizza, and all it’d cost us is the stamps.